This appears to be a very clear and articulate discussion thread on the subject of "marital rape". I haven't had time to read it all, let alone digest it, but I thought I'd hand it along. You may find it worth your while.
A couple of quick thoughts here. The main problem with the issue of marital rape is no different than for rape in general. It concerns the question of evidence/corroboration/he said-she said, and all that sort of thing. It amuses me to watch people continually missing the mark in this connection, when they are conversing upon this subject. It seems to me that they are throwing their darts at the wrong dartboard!
Positive proof is hard enough to secure even in a standard rape case, but in the marital kind the difficulty is uniquely compounded. Here we have two people sharing their home and their lives on a permanent basis and, at least in theory, having sex regularly as part of the package. A single act of so-called rape becomes mighty difficult to distinguish against the background of normal spousal intercourse which is presumed to be occurring anyway. The parties are alone together in a bedroom late at night, and. . . a "rape" occurs. In a standard rape case, the context as I have described it would carry a very different evidentiary loading - likely to the benefit of the plaintiff. But in a marital rape case it oughtn't unduly impress any judge or jury in terms of securing a guilty verdict. After all, husbands and wives are expected to be alone together in bedrooms late at night - and often in a state of partial or total undress, so that it becomes more problematic for her to say "he ripped my clothes off!"
In sum, rape is hard to prove and "marital" rape is damnably harder!
Another point I would make regarding marital rape as a legal concept is, that it radically undermines the institution of marriage. Early feminist anti-rape activists effectively said "down with the idea of conjugal rights!" All right, fair enough. But if you enshrine that idea into law, then in theory you might as well throw marriage out the window. It becomes possible for spouse A to go on a permanent sex strike against spouse B. That leaves spouse B with three options: 1) Celibacy, 2) Extramarital satisfaction, or 3) Divorce. Nothing in the scenario I have painted bodes well for the future of marriage as an institution - at least in the form that we know it. I suppose that was part of somebody's agenda all along, but did they ask the rest of society if such a thing was wanted?
I will touch only briefly upon the possibility of false rape accusation within marriage. This, along with all the other possibilities for false accusation in marriage (which have come about with full feminist connivance if not active support), turns marriage into a poisonous trap that men would be wise to avoid.